Tuesday, May 5, 2009
I know, I know. It has been forever since I have written. Its been crazy and busy and everything! Well, I am down 55 pounds! Why am I not satisfied with that? If you could see my face you would probably wonder why I am not jumping up and down. Well, I have gotten a taste of heaven so to speak and I am not satisfied with where I am. I am ready to do more to get down to the size I want to be. Ok...so let me back up. When it comes to losing the weight, I tend to lose a bunch then stay at that weight for a while and then drop more. It has been my patter throughout my weight loss. I am so anxious to be in the 100's (36 more pounds) that I have taken up jogging avidly and have been steady now for 4 weeks! But alas, the weight remains the same. Stuck at 235. I don't mean to sound ungrateful just really really eager.
I just recently bought some new clothes. Buying new clothing is tricky because I am not sure what I will be down to but I can't look like a bag lady in the interim. It's almost like growing your hair out! I finally bought some normal clothing that isn't cinched with a belt or falling off my shoulders. I bought 5 outfits for each day for work and hopefully I can mix and match. May the fashion gods forgive me as I start my wardrobe all over again. Right now I am in the "medium hair length stage", so to speak! It's good to have that problem. I actually took some time to reflect on how great this all was. 6 months ago I was at 290 pounds. Even with this accomplishment, I tend to look up other people's progress and compare it to mine. Did she lose more? At what month? How old is she? How big was she? It goes on and on. I am basically driving myself crazy. I am trying to bask in my own glory while leaving my competitive spirit out of this!
I still have great restriction with 2.00cc's in my 4.00 cc band. I think thats great. I still have head hunger and mourn the food I have to leave on my plate. I can't help it. I am mad that I can't eat it all. I am not hungry, I just love the taste and want more....but the ole stomach will not allow it!
Well, guys wanted to check in and let you know I am still in the race.
Hope all is well!